Disconnect!

Note- When this post was originally planned, I was terribly bored and was over-thinking things. An idle mind is indeed a devil's workshop!

DIWALI!!! The festival of lights, the festival of holidays. Time to gorge on sweets and then gorge some more, time to make merry and celebrate the good things in life, time to meet long-lost friends and loved ones. Diwali is also the season of nostalgia, because you receive countless Happy Diwali messages from people who you have literally not spoken to or texted in a long time. And this leads me to the point of this post.

There is a famous saying on the internet which goes by: It is surprising how day by day nothing changes, but when you look back, so much has changed. Truer words have never been said. Day by day our life gets so busy, we often forget where we started off from. And everybody flies off from the same point to different destinations, that the change as a whole is too large to comprehend at once. And then when we meet on such occasions as Dwali or weddings, we feel a disconnect. Today, more than ever, I can feel it right in my face. I am currently on a festive break from my extremely hectic schedule, and realise that I haven't had this much of free time, since more than a year. So much has changed in this year, I have gotten busier and there are a thousand things on my mind all the time. Which is why, this sudden free time made me visit my Whatsapp list and say a HI to many people, people who I just missed being in touch with, owing to my hectic schedule, people I feel disconnected from, thanks to the routine.

Call it the quarter-life crisis hitting you, or whatever you must, but Diwali does not feel like Diwali anymore. The crackers have reduced, the excitement has gone down, the visits to relatives have reduced, the sweets have reduced and overall, the joy has reduced. But Diwali is still reminiscent of long-lost friendships and laughter, and we must make make every effort to uphold this tradition. To avoid disconnects with people, it is necessary to stay connected all year round, and not just on Diwali. Make that phone call you have been wanting to make, wish that friend on his/her birthday and make small talk, call a friend randomly just to say HI, do not put off visiting your relatives because it is too boring, have dinner with your family with conversations and not just in front of the TV, do not be at home and shut the door of your room all the time. Open up, make small talk, converse and just connect! Open the door to happiness, and let the laughter flow.

Oh yes, Happy Diwali..

Life - thou art a fickle friend!

It has been about four months since I quit my job, and I have been in touch with a couple of friends from the office after that. So, one evening, I receive a call from my office friend V:

V: Hey, you remember our office friend A?
Me: Of course, I do. What about him?
V: Well, he passed away today, while he was in office. He had a severe heart attack.
Me: WHHHAAAAATTTTTTTTTTT????!!!!!

It was one of the most shocking things I had heard, in a long, long time. Well, you see, A was in his mid-twenties, physically fit, a vegetarian, a teetotaller, a non-smoker; i.e. he had none of the vices that otherwise led people to suffer from strokes and heart diseases at such a young age. It therefore came as a terrible shock when I leant that he had died of a heart attack.

A and I first met when we were on an onshore assignment in the UK, and we did not get along at all. We managed to rub off  each other the wrong way, always, and often tore strips off each other whenever me met. Thankfully , for both of us, my onshore assignment ended early and I returned to India. A followed suit in a couple of months, and there we were, back in the same office, seeing each other everyday. It was during this time that I got to know him well, and realised that we were both very similar by nature. He had big dreams, and his ideas and dreams resonated with mine. Better late than never, we became really good friends and I was happy I found someone in the office I could share my ideas and ambitions with.

A was a dreamer. He had big dreams. He was never content with the present, he always strove for more, for better, for brighter, for higher. I admired this quality in him, that he found motivation within himself, and did not look externally to find motivation or encouragement. When I told him that I was planning to quit my job and sought his advice, he told me to always look at the big picture, and never fret about the small things and petty issues. He inspired me to follow my dreams, and instilled in me the confidence that I was destined for bigger and better things in life.

Grief-stricken as I was, his sudden demise has got me thinking. A had told me to look at the big picture. What if there is no big picture? When we hear things like 'It won't matter in the long run', are we sure that there is a long run? In this fickle world of today, what if the big picture, the long run never come? Everything is uncertain, most of all, the lives we lead and the breaths we take. We immerse ourselves so much in the chase for the long run and the ultimate goal, that we fail to realise that there is life in the journey too. Life is not a chase to the destination of success and glory, but a journey -  a journey of  ups and downs, successes and failures, joys and sorrows,  and most of all love and laughter. It is not a journey to be rushed, but cherished. Who cares what the long run looks like? So far as you have had a beautiful journey, the ultimate destination is irrelevant. The ultimate goal is definitely not worth it, if you are dying a little, each day, in chasing that goal or dream. If you are ever stuck in a dilemma, do not only think about what is best in the long run. It is important to enjoy the journey as much as the destination, only then will you be truly happy. It took your death for me to realise, A, that it is important to strive for happiness, not just the long-run happiness, but happiness and contentment in everyday life as well. If you are unhappy or dissatisfied with your present situation, strive and make an effort to change the situation, never accept anything less that what you truly deserve or desire, without so much as an effort. Work hard for your short-term success and happiness, and the long run will take care of its own.

In your death, A, you have given me wisdom, and I am sure there can be no better memory than that! RIP, my friend. You shall be sorely missed. 

Long Time, no see..

Hello there!

I am back!!!
And I promise to stay. Well, at least I will try to...Pakka.. 100%... kasam se re! :P

I realise I have been away for a long time now, and I am not happy about it. I feel ashamed to admit that I have a blog, which has been dormant for ages now.

Not that I have not had any ideas to write about, but I have just been lazy. More so, after I jumped head-first into the crazy,twisted and engaging world of 140 characters. It's just that there's something very attractive and irresistible about people who can be sarcastic in 140 characters ;)

But, that's no excuse to write off the longer, but more interesting and elaborate word of blogging. Not every idea, feeling, emotion or thought can be expressed in a few characters, and then we must resort to good old blogging. Micro-blogging is contemporary, blogging is a classic ;)

I will just conclude by saying that, it feels amazing to be back here in blogosphere. I promise to think more, write more, elucidate more and just be more expressive, fluent and steadfast with my thoughts and opinions.

:)

Has the blogging inertia ever hit you? How did you get over it? Please drop in your comments below...

P.S. This is an impromptu post, no drafts. Just wrote down and hit 'Post'. I would love to have more such impulsive posts too, along with well-thought out ones... :)

The Happy List!

So I recently came across this page on Facebook called 'The Happy Page'. It is kind-a nice to have a page that captures the small things in life, that make one happy. That too, with illustrations. :D

So, I thought of compiling my very own Happy List..
The small things in life that make me happy..
Here goes, in no particular order:

• A cup of chaai with biscuits... not cookies
• Chocolate cake
• Maggi
• The smell of the wet soil when it rains
• Mumbai rains
• Mumbai!!!
• The Friday-evening wallah feeling
• Bumping into an old friend unexpectedly
• Hugs
• When my crush smiles at me ;)
• A good meal
• When I smell good
• A good-hair day
• When someone compliments you for something
• Shopping
• When you hear your parents over the phone
• When your little brother messages you, that he misses you
• When people laugh hard at a joke you cracked
• When someone smiles at something you say
• Chocolates of any shape,size and flavour
• A baby smiling up at you
• When a dress fits perfectly
• When someone says that you have lost weight
• A hard workout at the gym
• A hot shower
• When you are all warm and cuddled up in your bed, just before you fall asleep
• A lazy weekend
• When a dream comes true
• When the breeze tousles your hair
• A bright, beautiful sunny day
• A clear, cloudless, starry night
• Strawberry milkshake
• When someone comments that I write well :)
• A sip of the perfect coffee
• Seeing a good movie
• A good time with friends
• A clean bedroom
• New clothes
• Unexpected surprises
• When someone gets you a gift
• New cosmetics
• Being just in time for the train/bus
• A good night's sleep
• A new pair of shoes :D
• Listening to a song, continuously on loop
• Being at home
• Spending quality time with your loved ones
• Ice cream - the whole can to yourself
• Sweets made in shuddh desi ghee
• Catching up on my favourite sitcoms after a hard day at work
• Harry Potter :D
• When your favourite movies play on TV
• Settling all dues
• When someone remembers some small thing/incident about you
• When someone tells you that they miss you (It is kind of sad too though)
• When you feel loved

What features on your list?

P.S. This post was lying in my drafts for months now, and I decided to publish it when a friend reminded me that my blog has been dormant for a lonnnngggggggggggg time now :P

Rains and Nostalgia

What is it about rains and nostalgia?
No seriously, tell me, what is it?
Why does one inevitably lead to the other?
Why DO the rains always remind me of childhood?
Those innocent, happy days..
The golden days of one's life, truly..

Image courtesy: artsonearth.com

As the rains lash Mumbai, the inevitable season of traffic jams, potholes, accidents,bumpy rides, train cancellations, delays etc begins.
But so does the season of nostalgia.
As I look out through the window at the wet cobbled streets, the freshly-acquired green color of the trees, the neon umbrellas and raincoats, the dark hues of the sky, emotions stir within me.
I am magically transported to the oh-so-lovely, oh-so-wonderful days of my childhood.
How the advent of the rains would mean the start of a new academic year.

I would LOVE to go to school.

Me being me, I would have read all the school textbooks, every single page, before the first day of school.
The smell of those new books, sitting with my grandfather in the verandah and wrapping those lovely books in brown paper, pasting those colorful Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck "labels" on them.... All of it still brings a smile on my face.
Then, mom would take me to buy a new pair of the school uniform, and I use to wonder, every single year, why my school had a drab, navy uniform when other schools had orange or pink uniforms :P :)
Then would finally dawn the 13th of June, when a new academic session of the school would start. There was always a lot of curiosity around the new class teacher, the classmates - who has left and who is new?, the new classroom, who has grown taller and who has had what haircuts...And we would show off and compare our "cool stuff" like school bags, water bottles, tiffin boxes, pencil boxes etc.with the others :P. And yes, inadvertently, it would rain on that day!
The rains ensured that the school discipline was tweaked a bit. So you could wear the rainy sandals, instead of the drab, old school shoes(which meant your toes could never have nail polish :P)
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Then as we became habituated to the new and the new became old, life would become "mundane"...

Then came the junior college days...

I happened to be in a prestigious one, just a stone's throw away from home. I don't really have many memories of the rains whilst I was here, because we hardly ever went to college :P .But  I remember how we used to sit in the open library, reading novels n newspapers and comics, while others around us were immersed in log books and journals and huge textbooks, and the rains and the wind would blow away any loose papers ,and drench every single sheet. The famous Mumbai deluge of 26th July also happened during this "era" only.

Then came the engineering college days..

Ah, most memories of rains relate to the hassles in commuting in the local trains. the incessant delays and cancellations due to water-logging, taking an hour for an otherwise 20 minute commute etc.
We used to eat the oh-so-tempting unhygienic street food, and later pray that we don't fall sick.
For a change, we used to attend lectures (:P), because our regular haunts like the "khopcha" -a memorable corner on the second-floor corridor of my college. My favorite place in the college.. lots of memories associated with this place  :)-, the staircase etc. were all washed out.
Rains would mean that the walls in  some classroom would leak so much that, these classrooms would be practically unusable, so they would be vacant. These would then be our "hangout" place, where we could play all we like. And boy o boy, play we did. Some of the best memories of  my college days are the games we played- dumb charades, pictionary, the dots and lines game, Taboo cards, "the cows and bulls" game, MAFIA etc. They were the primary reason I survived those never-ending lectures :P
And those wonderful rainy picnics with friends, especially Matheran and Bhivpuri waterfalls. AMAZING!!!

College and rains are also special to me in a way, because college was when I and a pact with self, that I would re-read the entire Harry Potter series, each year, around the time of my birthday(no prizes for guessing which season it is in). It's been almost 4 years, and I still stand by this pact. In fact, I look forward to this time of the year. Nothing can take my mood down then, because I know, whatever happens, in the evening all's going to be well, since I would be in an entirely new world :)
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And today, rains give me mixed feelings. I hate it when the heavens pour down, when I am heading to work. I hate it when I get wet in the rains, when I don't want to. I hate it when I have to make my way across muddy paths. I hate it when the trees keep dripping even when the rains have stopped.

But I also love the rains, because they bring back my childhood to me.
They bring back memories of long-lost innocent times and old friendships.
They bring back memories of my school and teachers.
They bring back memories of simple, carefree times.
They inspire me to look back at the road behind with a smile, and not tears.
They motivate me to look deep within, and face the road ahead with determination and strength.
They make me cherish the past, live the present, and anticipate the future.
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And oh, they also bring with them kanda-bhaji and masala chai ;)

Paint it RED!!!

Lately I have started catching up on makeup, fashion, beauty and such other girly stuff, after being a nerd all my life.

Ok ok, I admit, a geeky nerd all my life...

And have steadily and slowly, started trying out things, that most girls try out when they are in their teens or even pre-teens (shudders!!!).

Having said that, I am not ashamed or repenting of my 'geeky nerd' past. But that's not the point of this post.

Ever since I remember, I have had short nails that are ....ummm....let’s just say NOT GOOD. They are rough and brittle, and just refuse to grow! I am seriously of the opinion that I will have to wait for a punar-janam (rebirth) to have long and pretty nails.

(Yes that's how pathetic my nails are)!

Hence I never even thought of putting red nail paint, which looks classy on long nails.

I have nail paints in all shades of pink and maroon, and even the rock chic (??!!) black but have never had the blood red one. Plus, I also sincerely thought that I didn't have the guts to pull it off well.

So the other day, I was out shopping for nail paints in bulk, for a nail art competition in my office; when I picked up a bottle of the blood red paint, for the first time ever (although not for myself). After the competition was done with, most of the girls picked up a couple of colours they liked.

For the first time ever, I made a mad dash for the red!!

Back home, I placed the bottle at a place that I happen to notice every time I am in the room. That bright red bottle kept mocking me and tempting me to pick it up,

But I was still not confident of pulling off that shade!

So last night, I mustered up all my courage, and thought 'What the heck! The whole world swears on this magical shade. I can try it at least once'. I also promised myself that if it looked ghastly on my nails, I would take it off immediately, and not allow it to see the light of the day.........umm........ like literally.

So I got myself one of my special at-home-self-manicures.

And voila, I had red nails!!

RED NAILS

RED NAILS

OHH MYYY GAWDDD (ok, I hate the way I have spelled god here, but *shrugs*. This spelling, may be very irritating, but it expresses my feelings, just about right)

 I am really really impressed with the results and how pretty this awesome colour makes my not-so-awesome nails look!!

Image courtesy: ashleewong.wordpress.com

Over the past few hours, I am slowly beginning to comprehend why ALL women love this classic shade:

- Cheapest way to feel and look classy (Oxymoron!)

- Easiest way to get dressy

- Makes you feel feminine and chic

- Looks good on all skin tones. For the longest time,

  I was of the opinion that it suits only fairer skin. Not anymore!

- Makes you look stylish

- Easily sets you in the mood

- Great way to make a statement

- Makes you appear powerful and confident

So if any of you girls out there are still feeling that they can’t carry off this bold shade, fight your fears girls!

Go paint it red! And soak in its classic beauty and glamour.
Kar lo duniya mutthi me (Hyperbole!!)

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Err, till it chips off :P

Making India safe for her daughters!

Trust me, there can be nothing as sad as the title of this post. The recent rape case of a 23-year old woman in the capital has shocked and disgusted millions. Yet, will this just be another case like the hundred-thousand rape cases before this, where we are shocked and sorrowed, but forget all about it within a week or so?

Thinking about this case, I don the introspective cap.Where do we, as a society, go wrong? Why is it that we have such callous attitudes to these heinous crimes? Is it because of the stigma attached to them? Or is it just that I-won't-bother-until-it-affects-my-life attitude? Nevertheless, this is something that cannot be, and must not be ignored. These people who commit such acts brazenly should of course, be punished, and in the harshest way, no doubt. The law will take its own course, but we should analyse the issue for its root cause.

I believe, that our society, in general is derogatory towards women. Just to cite an example, the normal content shown on Indian television(read: daily soaps and reality shows), is very sexist and male-dominated in general. We show female vamps, one female oppressing another. We openly see how girls or ladies in daily soaps,are abused, physically and emotionally, and they put up with it mutely.This content may be purely for entertainment, and coming with that clichéd disclaimer(that all the TV soaps show before the start of each episode), but it still sends out the message, loud and clear,that you can oppress and abuse and bully women, and it is okay, because it is Indian culture.
It is okay to eve-tease and catcall,whistle,hoot at women, because my brothers and friends do the same.
It is okay to not treat a woman with respect, because that's how a husband treats his wife.
It is okay to mistreat and molest any woman in public, because she is the helpless and inferior sex.
It is okay to abuse a woman, because it's fun!!
Basically, a woman is not my equal, and is someone to be abused and looked down upon, and nature has made her as such.
Till the time this thinking does not change, our nation will keep birthing generations of rapists and molesters.
It's time the psyche should change.

So what can we do, as determined(no doubt) citizens?

We should have a strong censor board, that cannot be bribed, and that keeps a check on the content in these shows. We should promote shows that depict a free society, where men and women are denoted as equals. Newspapers and other news media should exhibit responsible journalism. I often complain, that most newspapers these days, in the race for gathering maximum readership, tend to blatantly use the pen, to give out such gory details of any crime, so much so that they often tend to glorify these crimes. Many a time, they even sympathize with the criminals, saying that they were frustrated youth and this crime was a way of just venting their frustration!! (Yes, they do that!!!!!) Newspapers have a responsibility to write in a manner that imparts the message, that crime is wrong, and shall be punished, no matter what. Don't even think for a second that you can get away with it.

Parents and social media should be collectively responsible to hone young boys to be gentlemen, who respect and treat women as equals and not someone to show their dominance. Parents should instill the fear of law within young boys, and impress upon them, that women are equals, and have as much dignity and freedom, as men.As the clichéd statement goes, don't teach your daughters to dress properly, teach your son to behave properly with women(Well, something like that!) If you think you are the superior, more powerful sex, don't try to demonstrate that by using derogatory words and abusing a female. Show that by protecting her, nurturing her.

Don't raise your sons to be men she fears and detests, raise them to be gentlemen she adores and looks up to.

P.S. You may feel this is far-fetched, but as the modern society is slowly and steadily realizing, social media does indeed have a profound impact on what our future generation grows up to be.